Editor’s note: War Stories is an occasional column in which Art Shulman, president of Shulman Research, Van Nuys, Calif., presents humorous anecdotes of life in the research trenches.

Sexism is not dead on college campuses. At least not in the market research class I teach. And it’s not necessarily the men who are sexist.
To illustrate what is meant by probing and clarifying, I asked one of the women in my class, in her early twenties, what she liked about playing with Barbie dolls when she was younger. She provided a number of responses, some of which required clarification, including that she liked “the accessories.”
I asked her which Barbie accessories she was referring to. Her reply: “Ken.”
So, now we know that at least some women attending college consider men accessories.

Bruce McLeary of Marketing Analysts reports that early in his career he worked in a phone room that regularly monitored interviewers by listening in while they executed the survey. The company was doing a tracking study for a utility in the Southeast and the first few questions were overall rating scales (very positive to very negative) about the customers’ electric, gas and water utilities. The interviewer screened the respondent, obviously someone from the rural South, then started in with the first overall rating question: “Now, thinking about your [ELECTRIC COMPANY], how would you rate your overall impression? Would…”
But she was interrupted before she could read the scale.
“I don’t like ’em,” stated the respondent forcefully.
The interviewer persevered, trying to make sure she read the scale as instructed: “Would you say you are very positive, somewhat…”
The respondent interrupted again with, “I’m positive I don’t like ’em!

Research consultant Daniel McCrobie was working in a jet airplane simulator doing research on a new product his company was introducing. The product would be installed in airplane cockpits and the company wanted to get pilots’ impressions of the new product, so they had them fly a short simulation.
One time McCrobie ran a bit late due to a pilot getting lost on the way to the facility that housed the simulator so he had to set up the simulator from the rear of the cockpit. While entering the flight data into the flight management system, he had his elbow on what he thought was the console. In actuality, it was on the display of the rear maintenance system. He heard the distinctive sound of glass breaking, looked down and realized he had demolished the rear display, an $80,000 piece of hardware.
McCrobie dejectedly reported the breakage to the maintenance manager, thinking he was going to be banned from the simulator or experience some other horrible punishment. But the manager told McCrobie that he was quite happy about the breakage, saying that that unit was acting up and that he could actually replace it now. McCrobie actually ended up making the manager’s day.
So, just remember, when you break something, don’t get upset. You may actually have done someone a favor.

Paul Lubin of Informa Research Services tells about the time when he was in Miami conducting focus groups during hurricane season. Just after the groups were completed, he was on his way to his hotel room when a storm hit and all the hotel lights went out. He eventually made it back to his room but had to feel his way against the wall and count the doors in order to do so.
The next morning he awoke early to catch a flight to Jacksonville for an important meeting, but it was still dark out and the hotel still had no power. Needing to shave and get dressed, the only way he could see what he was doing was when lightning flashed. So, there stood Lubin, waiting for nature to cooperate so he could get ready. He made some progress but the flashes were brief and intermittent. It wasn’t going well. Eventually he gave up, thinking what he was doing was insane.
What’s so unusual about market researchers thinking what they are doing is insane?
Lubin also relates receiving a call from the president of a large health and beauty aid manufacturer, who was calling to complain about a store auditor Lubin’s firm had in the field. Working on a hot day at one store of a large Southern grocery chain, the auditor had gone behind some crates and taken off her pantyhose, thinking no one was watching. Of course, store cameras recorded it all, prompting the chain’s president to call Lubin’s client to express his outrage.
Lubin reports that the auditor’s shelf inventory and delivery measurements were accurate, though.